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Stonewalling occurs when parties create mental and physical distance to avoid conflict by appearing busy, responding in grunts, and disengaging from the communication process. [7] [6] Gottman's and Levenson's research found it to be most common among men and a very challenging behavior to redirect once it becomes habitual. [4] [3]
The Conflict Lens is founded on the belief that the concept of style is limited in that it does not inform a person what behaviors would be most valuable in successfully resolving conflict and that conflict resolution is based more on situational context than on dominant style (Callanan, Benzing, and Perri, 2006). [1]
Gottman has published over 190 papers, and is the author or co-author of 40 books, notably: [11] Nan Silver; Gottman, John (1994). Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: What You Can Learn from the Breakthrough Research to Make Your Marriage Last. New York: Simon & Schuster. ISBN 978-0-671-86748-5. Joan Declaire; Gottman, John (1997).
A conflict style inventory is a written tool for gaining insight into how people respond to conflict. Typically, a user answers a set of questions about their responses to conflict and is scored accordingly. Most people develop a patterned response to conflict based on their life history and history with others.
Thomas and Kilmann proposed five modes of conflict management, developed from 1960 to 1975, which can be used to handle particular conflicts. [2] The United States Institute for Peace has published a free modified version of the Thomas-Kilmann test. [8] In that test collaborating is called problem solving.
Gottman also writes about the "Four Horseman" that are important to minimize and avoid: 1) criticism, 2) defensiveness, 3) contempt, and 4) stonewalling. [1] Of these four, he warns that contempt is the highest predictor for divorce.
Each axis has a numerical scale of 1 to 9. These axes interact so as to diagram five different styles of management. This grid posits the interaction of task with relationship and shows that according to how people value these, there are five basic ways of interacting with others.
The mathematical model of game theory [a] originally posited only a winner and a loser (a zero-sum game) in a conflict, but was extended to cooperation (a win-win situation and a non-zero sum game), [b] and lets users specify any point on a scale between cooperation, [2] peace, [Note 1] rivalry, contest, [3] crisis, [4]: 2 and conflict [5 ...